Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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