U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize