so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
