I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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