so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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