spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
