So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
