just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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