no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Randomize
