69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
