Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
