I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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