I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
