You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
