You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
