Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I need to calm my uterus...
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize