i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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