I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
