I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
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