My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
