hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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