cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
