No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
