That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
