Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
