I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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