In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize