Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
