Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize