Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
