You really coming over, don't trick.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
