I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
