We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
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