you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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