anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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