You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
