Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
