and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize