oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
It was a blind-side dick pic.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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