Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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