just come out here and I will go home with you...
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
