Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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