On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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