Say something about gay babies.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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