so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
