Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?

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(412): Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline? http://tfl.nu/g8m6

Replies (45) Good night (1515) Bad night (546)
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(404): View more from Georgia

I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...

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(404): I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl... http://tfl.nu/69tn

Replies (29) Good night (3133) Bad night (581)
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(519): View more from Ontario

i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??

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(519): i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man?? http://tfl.nu/83cs

Replies (10) Good night (4469) Bad night (1115)
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(813): View more from Florida

Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.

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(813): Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear. http://tfl.nu/hyjr

Replies (20) Good night (731) Bad night (6482)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.

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(978): benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are. http://tfl.nu/ifpr

Replies (4) Good night (4927) Bad night (585)
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(661): View more from California

I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.

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(661): I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck. http://tfl.nu/we3a

Replies (21) Good night (3919) Bad night (2017)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.

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(505): I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat. http://tfl.nu/2tx3

Replies (14) Good night (3977) Bad night (1326)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes

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(479): I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes http://tfl.nu/u839

Replies (25) Good night (4164) Bad night (1252)
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(850): View more from Florida

Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.

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(850): Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time. http://tfl.nu/840u

Replies (17) Good night (1927) Bad night (878)
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(559): View more from California

she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.

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(559): she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer. http://tfl.nu/y0m8

Replies (8) Good night (883) Bad night (1984)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...

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(405): He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door... http://tfl.nu/vmh9

Replies (3) Good night (1168) Bad night (453)
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(506): View more from New Brunswick

Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?

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(506): Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant? http://tfl.nu/bdft

Replies (3) Good night (708) Bad night (615)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...

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(843): There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room... http://tfl.nu/5owj

Replies (3) Good night (1237) Bad night (433)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.

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(919): Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes. http://tfl.nu/z2vt

Replies (0) Good night (599) Bad night (238)
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(310): View more from California

I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.

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(310): I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool. http://tfl.nu/mhjn

Replies (3) Good night (931) Bad night (431)

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