do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
The air was thick with penises
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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