im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
