She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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