lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Acid is not a monday night drug
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
